HomeAbout LisaLisa's CalendarBlog PagePresentation TopicsFees and PaymentStudent TestimonialsTestimonialsSchools Impacted by DeathAdolescent Dating ViolenceAdoption IssuesAges and StagesSeniorsBooks for AdultsBooks for ChildrenBooks Change LivesBullyingChildren at Funerals?Children Coping with a DeathChildren of AddictionCollege, Grief and SuicideCommon Signs of GriefComplicated GriefCrisis HotlinesCultures and GriefCyberbullyingDeath: Car CrashesDeath of a childDeath of a Teen FriendDeploymentDepression SymptomsDepression in Children/TeensDivorceDomestic ViolenceEating DisordersExplaining Death to ChildrenFacts/StatisticsFears and Worries in KidsA Friend is DyingGrief TermsGrief Videos with MilesGamblingGLBTGuilt and RegretsHelpful ProductsHIV InformationHIV MedicinesHIV/AIDS support groupsHIV Testing in NJImmigration and LossIncarcerationJob Loss and GriefListeningLooking for SupportLossMen and GriefMental Health SupportMiscarriage or Stillbirth LossMurder or HomicideNational Support GroupsPhysicians and EmpathyParent Has CancerParent ProgramsPhoto GalleryPTSDQuotes on GriefSchool FightsSchool ProgramScream Box: How to MakeSelf Injurious BehaviorSexual AbuseSibling LossSpecial Needs & Children 1Special Needs & Children 2What Parents Can DoSpeaking to Very Ill PeopleStudents Share ConcernsAfter a Suicide AttemptSuicide PreventionAfter a parent's suicide: returning to schoolHealing After a Suicide (School)Suicide Survivors SupportSupporting a GrieverSpiritual AssessmentTalking to Grieving ChildrenThe Mayonnaise JarTraumatic and Sudden LossTLC of NJTeen GriefTeens Grieving in SchoolTeen ResourcesTeen Recommended BooksTraumatized ChildrenVirtual BookViolent DeathWhat to Say to a GrieverWhat Not to Say to a GrieverWhat is Mourning?What is Grief?When a Child is Dying (guidelines)When a Parent Dies

Divorce Information and Resources for Adults, Parents and Educators

 

The Grief of Divorce:

 

Grief is the normal and natural reaction to a loss. Grief is the conflicting emotions that occur following the loss or change of a familiar routine.

(Grief Recovery Handbook , by John James and Russell Friedman). 

A wonderful divorce recovery coach is Shelley Stile. She recently had me on as a guest on her Blog Talk Radio Show called: Life After Your Divorce.  We spoke about: Understanding and Coping with the Grief of A Divorce. Below you may click on the arrow to begin playing the show. The show is an hour in length and covers such issues as normal grief, the grief process in divorce, how to express feelings in healthy ways, the importance of a support network, the difference between situational and clinical depression and more.

Blog Talk Radio Show : Aired March 1, 2010  Lisa Athan was a guest on the Blog Talk Radio Show of Shelley Stile, Life After Your Divorce, in a program entitled: Understanding and Handling the Grief of Divorce.    Shelley has a wonderfully helpful web site:   www.LifeAfterYourDivorce.com  Click on the link below:

Life After Your Divorce

Helpful books about Divorce:

The Grief Recovery Handbook by John James and Russell Friedman

Ambiguous Loss, Learning to Live with Unresolved Grief, by Pauline Boss (1999)

Liberating Loss: 

Spiritual Divorce  Divorce as a Catalyst for an Extraordinary Life  by Debbie Ford  (2001)

Necessary Losses by Judith Viorst

Books for Children:

 Let's Talk about it: Divorce  by Fred Rogers (1996)

 My Family's Changing: A First Look at Family Break-Up by Pat Thomas

It's Not Your Fault Koko Bear: A Read Together Book for Parents and Young Children During Divorce  by Vicki Lansky

Dinosaurs Divorce:  A Guide for Changing Families by  Laurie Krasny Brown and Marc Brown

I Don't Want to Talk About It  by Jeanie Franz Ransom

Families Change: A Book for Children Experiencing Termination of Parental Rights  by Julie Nelson

 

Pamphlet for Teens:

Empower Yourself : A Teenager's Guide to Coping with Your Parents' Divorce (Or the ten most important things to know when your parents separate) by Jacob Solomon  ( For more information about how to obtain this informative pamphlet contact Lisa at Lisa@griefspeaks.com)

 Books for Parents: 

Talking to Children About Divorce by R. Garon and B. Mandell

Divorce Book for Parents by V. Lansky

Helping Your Kids Cope with Divorce the Sandcastles Way by M.G. Neuman

The Good Divorce by C. Ahrons

Cooperative Parenting and Divorce by S.B. Boyan and A.M. Termini

 

For Counselors and Educators:

Creative Interventions for Children of Divorce by Liana Lowenstein  (Includes ideas for running a divorce group at school which includes such topics as: Understanding Divorce, Identifying and Expressing Feelings, Sharing Stories, Living in Two homes, Expressing and Coping with Sadness, Identifying and Coping with Anger, Feeling Good about Myself and the Future, Coping with Divorce). 

Teaches children how to talk to parents about such things as fighting through techniques such as letter writing: Here is an example of what a child can write to parents who has been fighting a lot with each other: 

"Dear Mom and Dad,

It upsets me when you argue in front of me, or tell me mean things about each other. I have learned

that it is okay to politely ask you to stop. So next time you argue in front of me, or tell me mean things

about each other, I am going to politely say, "Please stop," If you continue to argue, I will go to another room so

I cannot hear you arguing. 

Thank you for doing your best,

 Love,

____________ 

The Divorce Helpbook for Kids by Cynthia MacGregor  (for children 8-12).  A down to earth guide to help with discussion on many topics that typically trouble children such as: reasons for the divorce, feelings, who to talk to, what helps, what may happen next.  This is a book for kids about divorce and about after divorce too. It discusses visitation, custody and straddling two households and making it work. 

  

For a Complete List of Resources and Support Groups dealing with Divorce:

The Self Help Support Group Directory:  New Jersey Self Help Group Clearinghouse  1-800-367-6274

www.selfhelpgroups.org

 Helpful websites that help with divorce:

www.aacap.org  American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry

www.arttherapy.org   American Art Therapy Association

www.afccnet.org   Association of Family and Conciliation Courts

www.NCTSNet.org   National Child Traumatic Stress Network

www.gocrc.com   National Council for Children's Rights

WWW.Griefspeaks.com      Lisa@griefspeaks.com     (973) 912-0177